One Step At A Time

One step at a time. One day at a time. This is how everything is achieved. No matter how big or small the task ahead, we simply get through most things by taking one step at a time.

That’s how I managed to finish my book, ‘Wearing Red - One Woman’s Journey to Sanity.’ I wrote 90,000 words, one word at a time. There were so many times when I felt that I could not manage to write this book.

The way ahead seemed so daunting. Too many ideas. Too many chapters ahead. Too much to achieve. Write a whole book - Who me? Self doubt in bucket loads. I nearly gave up on so many occasions. I had to make the commitment to show up at my computer each day and just write one word at a time. This led to one sentence, then one paragraph, one page, one Chapter... and so on, until the first draft of my book was finished.

We are faced with testing events. Obstacles that seem insurmountable. Yet by taking one step forward at a time, we confront these hurdles one day at a time, and we come out the other side, against the odds.

Anne Lamott wrote a beautiful book called ‘Bird by Bird,’ which is a useful guide on getting started with writing. To me it’s also about this mantra of simply taking life one step at a time.

She refers to writing being like driving a car at night when you don’t have to see your destination. You just have to see the short distance ahead of you that your headlights illuminate for you. And somehow you manage to make the whole journey in this way. Isn’t this just like life? We move forward slowly, in short sections, and somehow we get to the end of that particular trip.

Anne Lamott refers to a time when her young brother was struggling with an assignment on birds that he had to write, due the next day. He had become paralysed by the enormity of the task ahead. His father sat down next to him and said “Bird by bird buddy. Just take it bird by bird.”

So, when you’re facing what seems like an impossible task or journey, remind yourself this is all you must do - take it ‘bird by bird,’ one step at a time. You don’t have to confront the whole difficult situation all in one go. We survive and move slowly forward by taking things one step at a time.

This is where list making helps. When you’re feeling overwhelmed with all the tasks ahead of you, just write them all down on a list and begin at number one. When that’s complete, tick it off and do the next one. Continue one step at a time and you’ll slowly see your list diminish.

You can feel pleased with yourself for what you’ve actually achieved. Feeling overwhelmed is like a brain fog. It closes down your ability to see things clearly, as to what is actually possible moment by moment.

Sometimes, it’s difficult to face even one step at a time. That’s when you need to stop for a while and practice some self-care. Be gentle and loving towards yourself. Cut yourself some slack and have a pyjama day. Take some time out to rest, recover, and heal. Allow your energy tank to refill and renew your strength before you face the day once more.

This is my seven-step guide to life:

1. Be where you are and remember to breathe.

2. Keep going forward one step at a time.

3. Do what you can gracefully.

4. Step out in faith.

5. Keep looking ahead.

6. Expect your guides to help (real or imaginary.)

7. AND THE WORLD CHANGES.