Finding Joy In Our Lives

How do we access joy in our lives when we are worn down by the daily grind of keeping afloat on physical, spiritual, emotional and mental levels?

It cannot be denied that we are living in difficult times and joy may not be something you have found much of recently. Yet joy can still be located in everyday, simple things, especially when we are able to live in the present moment.

As Dr Patrizia Collard tells us in her book ‘Mindfulness’, the ancient wisdom of Taoism says that life is made up of 10,000 joys and 10,000  sorrows. If we only focus on the sorrows then we are not seeing the full picture.

For every experience of hardship and suffering, there is an equal portion of joy and contentment. They are all part of the rhythmic ebb and flow of life.

When we do experience joy we often try desperately to hold onto it, wishing we could freeze time and feel like this always. But the reality is that tide turns and our moods and experiences change in the same way.

If we can sit back and just let the joy be there when it comes and appreciate the moment, instead of grabbing at it, we can enjoy the pleasure and then let it go.

Jonny (my husband) and I call these pocket-size episodes of contentment, however small, our ‘through leaves moments.’ I started a small journal to record these times that have offered nourishment in our lives. I can look back at the entries and remember them with fondness. Like keeping a scrapbook of joy.

These are not great occasions but mundane moments that create a sense of well-being inside ourselves – a surge of happiness. Like kicking through leaves as a child. Remember that feeling of sheer abandonment to the here and now.

We cannot seize these pleasant sensations and hold onto them. By clutching at what we want to keep, the more quickly we lose it. Change is inevitable. That makes the moments of joy even more precious.

We can celebrate being alive with all its variety. Can we retain a childlike sense of wonder and enthusiasm for the small pleasures we experience?

If we have expectations that some particular event or occasion will bring us such joy, we are often disappointed. Whereas, when we just show up and experience what comes to us, we are often surprised by the magic that can come from the least expected source.

If we prepare ourselves to be mindful in all of our experiences, without expectation, we can practice becoming more open to the goodness that exists in our everyday lives and within us.

We can start each day with this intention to be more open to joy in our lives. I take a half hour walk each day and just do it for the sheer pleasure of moving my body after a day sitting at my desk writing or doing admin chores.

Despite the way I am feeling, I never cease to be blown away by my surroundings. The mountains do this every time and the delights of the meditative river offer me such magic, floating by me ignorant of my petty squabbles with the day.

It may sound difficult but we can choose to be glad in the midst of suffering. I read that some of the holocaust prisoners scratched images of butterflies on the walls to remind themselves of a different existence and to experience fleeting moments of joy despite their horrendous experiences.

Stay in touch with your  intention to be open to joy and gladness and guide  your mind to more moments of well-being.

Notice how you are feeling in mind and body when you are in the middle of doing something enjoyable, or performing some act of kindness. Notice it as best you can.

Nurture your connection to your senses and let in these precious moments of joy.

I’m off for my walk now.

Author of memoir, ‘Wearing Red, One Woman’s Journey to Sanity.’

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